Thanks deady for the advice, and also I'm curious so 2 questions:

Theres a massive going away party tomorrow and there will be shitloads of alcohol and teens including me. How do I get smashed (or have fun) whilst my mum is at the party?

Secondly, I've recent binged out on weed this week (Tried it about 8 or 9 times, about 20 cones in total) and still cough like a whore. I don't smoke cigs, don't plan to either, so how can I enjoy this stuff without coughing?

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Hey deady, my dick needs sucking and boaf isn't around. Fix it.

That'll be two bucks, John
~Guv'na

Cocaine.


The only thing you CAN do to fix this problem is to man up and do the homework etc. Sorry homey, no easy way out.


In the dryer. Or in the sun. Or in the corner of your room over a persiod of a day or two. Or go down town and pay a crack addict to do it for you, they like doing things for people.


I DO NOT CONDONE UNERAGE DRINKING!!! Seriously, you would probably just get sick anyways and puke and get caught. That being said, I'm sure you wont be the only one planning on drinking, normally at stuff like that the kids go to the basement and sneak some booze with them. If you want to play it safe, bring an opauqe bottle with you and weasle your way to the booz. Fill the bottle up, and throughout the night mix it in with whatever you are drinking in your normal cup.

As for the weed, there is NO way to smoke and not cough. My roomate has been smoking every day for the better part of 20 years, and she still coughs her ass off. Your best bet is to not smoke it in the first place, but eh, there are worse things you could be doing.


If Guv'na didnt satisfy your need for felatio, see the advice I gave Phail about going downtown, only substitute "sucking dick" for "drying clothes". Should be cheap, which is how I know you like it.

Dear deady, I need to get better at school and I fucking hate it and I never learn, what can I do? I never do homework, I never study for exams, In other words I'm really lazy.

What can I do to fix my lazyness?

Well, man, like I told fat0ninja, there really is no way to "fix" this. Like, this is something I have struggled with my entire life (notice how many replies this thread got over the three days it was open, because when I was doing this I probably should have been doing homework >.>) and there really is no easy or simple way to get around it. You're only choice is to suck it up, and do the shit.

Depending on the person, you might have some sort of behavioural issues that may be negatively affecting you. I spent a long time thinking this sort of thing was bullshit, and while I DO still think that ADD and ADHD are over diagnosed (either for an easy answer or to move prescriptions) but I also have come to realise that there is a good amount of validity to it all in some cases. God knows school has never been something I have the patience or discipline for, even though I really do love to learn and have been told I am at least moderately intelligent. Which is, I'm guessing, the case with you and fat0ninja and a whole lot of other people, you aren't dumb, you just don't do the shit.

It might help to talk to your parents or guardians or whoever will listen and could do something about it, talk to them honestly. Just tell them you cant bring yourself to do anything, you don't know why, and you want to fix it. Other than that, the only advice I could ever give, and the only thing you are likely to ever hear is "man up and just do the shit" and admittedly sometimes it isn't that simple...

Now I'm off to do homework :/ I'm creeping up on 30 and still doing homework. lol, life is grand.

Thank you deady.
I'll just do the "shit", time to change, something that always happens to me is this; Yeah I'm back from school and now home gah I'm so relaxed... I watch some tv and most people of my age would se "Then I get up to do homework" but noooo, I do this; Cool I'm back from school, let's watch some tv, then I say oh I gotta clean my room and then do homework, (I clean my room and end up tired) fuck this, I already cleaned my room, why should I do homework? I'll do it tomorrow on the morning. Then I wake up extremely late like 15 minutes left to prepare myself. or I just don't care about anything and sit like a lazy, weird thing I haven't got fat.

Dear Deady,

I really need some money or else I am going to get killt by the pringle mafia. I would get a job but I thought it over by playing the sims and that takes way to long and is wayyy to hard, so I figure I can do easy way and learn TELEPHONESIS!!! Now I need some lessons on this but dunt no were to find em? THIS IS SERIOUS BNZN IF U NOT ANSER I CAN DIE. So halp me with my telephonies please. i tried hard and hard but then I gave up because yoda says do or do not there is no try so all that work was for nothing!!!


^You better answer that but more srs is below V


So I procrastinate wayyy to much for everything even stuff I want to do, like learn telefunesis, I just can never get around to doing it I do other stuff like chat online or play video games or watch tv or play with my phone, its so important to do it but I dont. This affects my school work as I know all the shit I get bad grades though because I dont do homework, a test comes around and I get an A or a B but I still get a D or a C from doin barely any homework. So, how to self hypnosis to be azn?