You've only been here since march. That's like less than 2 months. I promise if you just make friends, be a part of an active clan with active members or just a personal friend of an active clan, you won't have this problem.

Go to RBtourneys, GMTourneys, betting rooms, etc. Form interpersonal relationships. You won't find this to be an issue anymore.

dude seriously? i'm twelve and i win lot of tourney -_-
and not in the n00b way

i alwase browes the muliplayer games looking for people to play with. best server for that are the servers where one is waiting. afterwards its all about communication. I am alwase kid and try o find someone who is on my level and ask him if he wants to play onther mod. if he is nice and wants to play i tell him to join my room.
so u normaly need to toribash windows open. one for fishing players and one with the mod set up.

EDIT: but i get the frustration of the op.. Toribash its a game that u alwase have to play together to make it work, no matter what mod u play. And trying to find someone who is willing to make the afford of playing with you not against you is really hard if you just use the multiplayer options and not the forum