Well, to be honest, not an awful lot of improvement here, if you ask me. You did something about diversity, but now you slipped into symmetricality. While this isn't exclusively bad, it quite nearly is. Making a symmetrical move look good is very hard, and not worth the effort.
But let me point out the other flaws:
- Stiffness. I guess you saw this one the last time, too.
- Flow. Once again, i repeat: Make your moves flow together.
- Innovation, or lack thereof. We've seen those moves a pretty big amount of times before.
Entertainment isn't a big enough issue to be listed.
I understand that you're pretty new, and that this is a pretty big mouthful, so instead of swallowing it whole, chew on it over some time. I don't expect anyone to instantly improve, and nobody else should either. Just let it buzz around in the back of your head while you're messing around.
Btw i don't actually enjoy being so critical. >.>